They Don't Have To Hit You For It To Be Abuse

They Don't Have To Hit You For It To Be Abuse

"An abuser isn’t abusive 24/7. They usually demonstrate positive character traits most of the time. That’s what makes the abuse so confusing when it happens, and what makes leaving so much more difficult."

I’ve felt like this for so long and it never seems to change.  I’ve been with a man for 6 years now, who always tells me when I make a mistake, that I don’t try hard enough.  Every day it’s something new that I haven’t done right. 

 

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When New Year's Resolutions Go Bad

When New Year's Resolutions Go Bad

It's New Year's Eve, 2016 and time to make those annual resolutions. You know, the ones you will break one week from now? Or at least that's the way it always worked for me. The problem, I finally figured out, is that resolutions are typically based on the "shoulds" in life which are defined by everyone around you instead of by YOU. Life changes need to start deep within and be driven by a true and honest desire. A resolution to work out 3 times a week or loose weight (very common choices) or work harder or go to church or whatever likely won't cut it

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Did This Election Make You Physically Sick? 6 Steps to Healing

Elections are typically anxiety-provoking, but I have been blown away by the responses I've seen this year with my clients. Families are fighting and even fragmenting - it's like the Civil War. I've also noticed that people are getting sick and canceling appointments. Is this the typical year end cold, or are people actually getting ill over this election process?

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Living in "Not Enough": How You Feel About What You've Got

Living in "Not Enough": How You Feel About What You've Got

When we see someone with something fantastic or a stroke of good luck, do we feel happy for them or envious because we want what they have?  The angel on one shoulder whispers "be happy for them" and the devil on the other shoulder possessively yells "it should be mine!"  Stephen Covey calls this the Scarcity Mentality.  We've been trained to think this way since birth and it's difficult to step out of it. However with practice we can live in abundance.  Read on...

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How to Boost Your Self Esteem in 4 Steps with DBT Skills

How to Boost Your Self Esteem in 4 Steps with DBT Skills

Low self esteem seems to be almost an epidemic in our society, yet we play the part of feeling strong and acting confident by what I call "putting on the face". This is also referred to as "Imposter Syndrome". With Imposter Syndrome you present yourself as the perfect employee, spouse, parent, friend, etc but inside you feel like a fraud, weak and falling apart at the seams. It takes tremendous energy to keep up appearances when you are in emotional pain, so the growing weariness burdens you even more and you end up in a repeating cycle: perform - berate yourself collapse - suck it up - perform.

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